About Me
Benjamin Walker Tay ★
2nd July 1991
NYP - SIT
CHC - N457 Moo ♥
LET'S TALK
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Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Hey readers :)
I decided to post as tomorrow is the results day !! .... Really nervous about it..... I dont know how will my results turn out.... In about 8 hours time, my results will be released and i really dont wanna see it..... :( I'm too nervous to see it either...
Anyways, I headed to SP today for a meeting with dan, along with shir willie and germaine :) After that, dan shir willie germaine went for POS training but i couldnt go thanks to my toe -.-ll So i decided to meet randall at buona vista to spend some time with him, since im already at dover.. But before meeting him, i had to go get my dinner, so i was trying to find the macs at SP but seriously... EPIC FAIL.... I got lost luhs.... -.-ll And i didnt even get to have my dinner at SP... Almost every where in SP that had food was already closed... so i decided just to go straight to buona vista first and meet randall... But then there was Hans and i could eat there plus talk to randall. :)
When i saw randall, I've really never seen him so broken down in my years knowing him.... I saw him having eyebags for the first time, and it was kinda black ( i couldnt really see clearly coz his skin is considered very tanned.. ) and he was just so down and out... Seeing him like this just makes me feel so sad for him... And there's not much i can do but just spend time and talk to him... I really wish there was something i could do just to make him feel better... He hasnt been sleeping well for more than 10 days and its really breaking him on the inside... Haiz... :(
I decided to stay over as he was like kinda hinting to me that he wanted me over, so i decided to just accomodate and just be there for him like he was for me. :) Although nothing i say could really make him feel better, but i know that just being there for him means a lot to him and to me as well. :)
The impact of a broken relationship is really unexplainable... Especially when it's the girl that hurt the guy.... I dont really blame her as she has her difficulties as well, but one thing i know is that she shouldnt have done this.. A girl must stand by her guy's side through thick and thin and not just back off whenever she wants to... After all, what is a relationship for ? A relationship is supposed to be where support, love, trust, faith, and etc comes from one another.. Both parties play a part in making the relationship work and going through the tests of time.. But it seems that she took the easy way out and just gave up before even trying... Its just so disappointing... She was the one who changed randall into a better person compared to the past.. But now, she just backed off knowing that it would hurt randall...
And to be fair, i talked to her online and to get both parties stories.. And as now, even when randall is sleeping, and as i sent her the final text for tonight, he still would wake up randomly and ask : "Has she replied yet ?"
Seeing randall like this really breaks my heart as his really close and good friend... I dont wish to see him build walls in his life... It was already so hard just to let himself share so much with me and etc... I dont wish to see it fade away overnight just because of one person...
In all these years, i have seen him knocked down but he would stand back up and fight on... I really dont know about this time.. He's just so vulnerable now... Really in a condition i have never seen before...
Alrights, I guess that's all for tonight bahs.. I gotta pei randall :)
Goodnights Readers~